I thought up a possible reason for why thinking of old ex girlfriends hurts inside. It's a little bit ridiculous and pompous, so I'm sure its not the only reason. Just a random thought. Its psychology shut up I can write it here.
So you think of an intimate moment with someone you can never be with again, you can never have that kind of moment with them again. It hurts you. It makes you cry or scream or something to get out the bad emotion. My stupid theory says that this is because you can never be the person you were when you were with them ever again. You have irrevocably changed.
and people dont like change, least of all changing themselves. You want to be the same person all the time, because thats trustworthy etc, I've talked previously about stability of self and things in a previous entry. When you are reminded that you are not as stable as you think yourself to be.
You arent what you think you are. and if you dont know who or what you are, then how can you be sure you know anything? It breaks you down at the core. and of course you attribute it to the person who the memory is based around, and you already have a convenient store of emotion for that person, it all just turns bad. THEY made you feel this way. It's THEIR fault. etc.
Theres also the more surface based abandonment issues and the loss of an emotional connection. Those were a bit more obvious so I didnt think about them as much.
Anyway, my theory may be crackpot, so let me know what you think.
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